I hate to wear shoes!
Being back at work...What a drag. Hot, humid, those wonderful dogs. Speaking of dogs I love it when people tell me "Oh, he won't bite!". Look, lady, your dog doesn't bite you, that doesn't mean he won't bite ME! I have scars to prove it. Especially the little ones, they have ATTITUDES! So, I've been back at work 2 whole days now. yippie! I really need to win that powerball. Hell, I'd even share. ha
Here's the story of my time off work. On July 10, I thought I would change my tire (I am woman I can do anything). Both my son and Big J told me they would change it, but NO I had to prove I AM WOMAN! I drive a Toyota Tacoma pre runner, the spare is under the truck. I lower the tire and attempt to slide it out from under the truck, WITHOUT SHOES! The tire jams my big toenail, causing it to split down the middle, then proceeds to take the left half of my toenail way beyond the quick and doctor says pass the nerves, and lay it on top of my toe. Now keep in mind the other half is still embedded in my toe. Now good old common sense ( or stupidity) told me to stick that sucker back into my toe. Hah! That will take care of that! Not! The pain was so immense I never cried (at least not until the ER which I'll tell you in a moment) I totally believe I was in shock. My whole body felt outside of itself, I kept telling myself "do not pass out" (I was home alone). I knew enough to sit down and I stuck a bag of ice on my head trying to stop this horrible sickening feeling. After 20 -30 min, I call dear old hubby, of course he leaves work, comes home, says he's taking me to the ER. I of course let him know "NO way was I going, I put my toenail back!" He looked at my toe and said "You're going". So we went.
The ER was great, got me right in. Great until they said "We have to remove your toenail"! I said "NO! I put it back! and besides My toenails are my best asset!" This is when I started to cry. I must have seemed pretty hysterical because the doctor asked if I wanted something to calm down. The doctor won. Shot me up with some numbing stuff, the left side of the toenail came out easy, the right side said "no deal, I belong here and I'm staying", so she pulled and pulled and pulled. You should have heard her! She said "Look! Your toenail is out! Isn't that awesome! Look at your toe without the nail!" OMG! Only a doctor could have an orgasm over a nailbed! She was very nice though. And best of all I got lots of pain pills. Have you ever noticed though, you can not get any kind of "high" when taking pain pills if you really need them. I needed them bad.
It's is a good thing I went. I did require stitches, and time off work. My toe is better, but ugly. I keep a bandaid on it so no one can see it. I did look at my toenail last Wednesday night, my husband found me on the floor knocked out cold. He said I was unresponsive. What had happened...I looked at my toenail, or should I say lack of toenail, and passed out. I do that. I had stitches at age 14 on my throat and when I pulled the bandage off I passed out at the sight of it. The doctors advice to me "If you are going to look at your toenail, sit down." Well duh!!
Here's the story of my time off work. On July 10, I thought I would change my tire (I am woman I can do anything). Both my son and Big J told me they would change it, but NO I had to prove I AM WOMAN! I drive a Toyota Tacoma pre runner, the spare is under the truck. I lower the tire and attempt to slide it out from under the truck, WITHOUT SHOES! The tire jams my big toenail, causing it to split down the middle, then proceeds to take the left half of my toenail way beyond the quick and doctor says pass the nerves, and lay it on top of my toe. Now keep in mind the other half is still embedded in my toe. Now good old common sense ( or stupidity) told me to stick that sucker back into my toe. Hah! That will take care of that! Not! The pain was so immense I never cried (at least not until the ER which I'll tell you in a moment) I totally believe I was in shock. My whole body felt outside of itself, I kept telling myself "do not pass out" (I was home alone). I knew enough to sit down and I stuck a bag of ice on my head trying to stop this horrible sickening feeling. After 20 -30 min, I call dear old hubby, of course he leaves work, comes home, says he's taking me to the ER. I of course let him know "NO way was I going, I put my toenail back!" He looked at my toe and said "You're going". So we went.
The ER was great, got me right in. Great until they said "We have to remove your toenail"! I said "NO! I put it back! and besides My toenails are my best asset!" This is when I started to cry. I must have seemed pretty hysterical because the doctor asked if I wanted something to calm down. The doctor won. Shot me up with some numbing stuff, the left side of the toenail came out easy, the right side said "no deal, I belong here and I'm staying", so she pulled and pulled and pulled. You should have heard her! She said "Look! Your toenail is out! Isn't that awesome! Look at your toe without the nail!" OMG! Only a doctor could have an orgasm over a nailbed! She was very nice though. And best of all I got lots of pain pills. Have you ever noticed though, you can not get any kind of "high" when taking pain pills if you really need them. I needed them bad.
It's is a good thing I went. I did require stitches, and time off work. My toe is better, but ugly. I keep a bandaid on it so no one can see it. I did look at my toenail last Wednesday night, my husband found me on the floor knocked out cold. He said I was unresponsive. What had happened...I looked at my toenail, or should I say lack of toenail, and passed out. I do that. I had stitches at age 14 on my throat and when I pulled the bandage off I passed out at the sight of it. The doctors advice to me "If you are going to look at your toenail, sit down." Well duh!!
posted by taybegasmom @ 8/09/2005 10:01:00 PM
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